Sayantan Sengupta

During the Games period, when the whole class used to go out, I used to sit in the classroom, and seeing my classmates return to class, all sweaty, ignited a weird feeling in me and I kind of liked that. Given that we had been studying together for the previous 8-9 years, and also me being an introvert and not discussing these things,  I assumed it was a common thing, but it wasn’t.

I went to an all-boys Christian missionary school, so I didn’t have much interaction with girls, and coming from a Bengali family, I was always more involved in painting and singing. As a teenager, boys are introduced to porn by friends, of course, and so was I. But when I watched porn, I realized that I enjoyed watching boys more compared to the girls in it. Back then I didn’t know anything about the LGBTQAIP+ spectrum, but in Class XI, when I got my first internet connection at home, I began Googling and found out about gays, lesbians; queers in general and thought that, Yes, maybe I am Bisexual. Incidentally, I also had my first relationship with a girl, who had just shifted to my neighborhood at the same time.

She used to study in the school next to mine, and we shared a bus stop, which is where we met. Being from the same standard, we gelled pretty easily. Because she was from the arts stream and I was from Science, with English being the only common subject, I decided to join the same English tuition, to spend more time with her. Our relationship lasted six years, during which time we spent a lot of time together and occasionally made out. But, later in our relationship, I began to feel guilty and worried that something was wrong; I never felt that level of excitement with her as I did when I was with boys. It was at this point that I realized I was “Gay.”

Life went on, and I finished my engineering degree and was hired by Infosys. I relocated to Bangalore. There, I began using several dating apps and received numerous matches. Talked with some but things didn’t work out.

One day, I matched with a guy on Grindr named Alok, who also happened to work for my company. We began meeting in the cafeteria and spent a great deal of time together. I felt so at ease with him that it was as if he were the missing piece of my “jigsaw puzzle.” I began to have feelings for him, and things escalated from there when I decided to visit him for the first time, and since then, I have moved in with him; we have been living together for three years.

We started dating in December 2017 and planned to take a vacation after completing three months together. Alok suggested that we go to Hyderabad because we had mutual friends there. On the 23rd of March 2018, we were both waiting for our train on the platform, when “He proposed” me. I can’t put into words how happy I was because it was the best day of my life.

In Jan 2020, one of my cousins was getting married in Bangalore. All my relatives, and parents were coming. Alok expressed an interest in accompanying me, and to my surprise, my mother requested that Alok, my flat mate, accompany me. The entire wedding was reminiscent of Ayushmann Khurana and Jeetu bhaiya’s story from Shubh mangal zyada savdhaan. He being the polar opposite to me, an extrovert, mingled with my entire family and impressed everyone with his amusing and friendly demeanor.

When I call my cousins, they all ask about Alok, and they enjoy talking to him so much that they sometimes call Alok directly instead of calling me.

I’ve told all of my cousins about our relationship, and they’ve all been extremely supportive. My parents are still unaware of our relationship, and as a single child, I hope I don’t accidentally break a hell on them spontaneously.  It will take some time. I need to do some groundwork till then, but I intend to tell them the truth by the end of the year. I understand that persuading both of our parents will be difficult, but we are prepared to face the worst and have faith in our relationship.

In three years, our love and passion for each other have reached a whole new level. We can no longer surprise each other because we can both read each other’s minds and know what’s going on in their heads. I can tell if he’s having a bad day at work or if he’s in trouble, and he can, too.

This year in May I got infected with the Coronavirus. He did everything for me, from washing my clothes to serving me food and consulting with the doctor, as soon as my reports came back positive. It was almost as if he was caring and treating me like a mother.

I intend to marry him in the future and share a long and beautiful life with him. All of our friends are very excited for it to happen, and we’re getting a lot of ideas from them. One of our friends, for example, wants us to have a destination wedding in Goa, while another wants it in the Maldives; the list of possible locations continues growing. I’m simply crossing my fingers that it happens so we can both live happily ever after.

Total Work Experience : 4 Years (Infosys)