Sexual Abuse

I was in kindergarten when my teacher molested me. I was around 3 to 4 years old. The only thing I remember about that incident is the pain and irritation that I had went through. My teacher used to come to my home and made me sit on his lap. Then he used to shove me from here to there. I was a kid, so I had no idea what was happening to me. But one day, I started crying because I couldn’t tolerate the pain. My mother realized and that was the last time I saw that teacher.

The second incident happened when I was 7th grade. Then, I was in Chennai to participate in the School Nationals. There I was assigned to one coach who used to help me in practice. Whenever I did well in the practice, he used to appreciate me. One day, my then best friend and I decided to visit a newly made park along with that coach. When we reached the park, my friend left us to buy popcorn. After she left, coach and I went inside that park and we found a couple of chairs to sit on. I waited for my friend to return but she didn’t. Then, all of sudden, my coach grabbed both of my hands with his one hand and with another hand he started pressing my private parts. I went all blank as I couldn’t understand what was happening to me. I started panicking. I thought of fighting. However I feared that what that monster would do to me if I fought back. So I started talking to him casually and asked him if we could go for a walk. We went to the main road, but he was still holding one of my hands very tightly. I could only think of rescuing myself. I requested him to release my hand so that I could put my shoelaces together. He released my hand. I bent down and acted like I was fixing my shoelaces. The moment he was looked in the other direction, I started running and came to the stadium hall where we used to stay. The hall was pretty big. It used to have 8-9 washrooms. I was shocked to find my friend inside the hall! When I asked her why she hadn’t returned, she said that she knew everything about that coach. For that reason, she had hesitated to return to us. I was speechless. I had guessed that coach would definitely reach there looking for me. Hence, I asked her not to open the main door and locked myself in one of the washrooms. My guess was correct. But never had I imagined that my friend would open that door and leave. The coach started searching for me in every washroom and finally found me in the one I was hiding. When I did not open the door, he broke the door and dragged me outside. Then he pushed me against the wall and started kissing me. I mustered all of my strength and courage and slapped him. After that I went to my friend and gave a tight slap to her as well. This story of this incident spread like a wild fire. People started judging me as if everything was my fault. I had run out of patience to explain everyone. They rusticated that coach instead of sending him to police! This gave me a bitter realization – that people are not actually what they seem to be.

I was overcoming this incident, when same thing happened for third time. I was in my B. Sc final year. Then I used to go to a gym. The gym trainer used to ask me to come to the gym when the place was less crowded. I thought that he was thinking about my betterment. However, little did I know the history was repeating itself. Whenever I was in the gym and doing my abs exercises laying down over a table, he used to come and sit on me saying that it was another exercise. I couldn’t utter anything because of the embarrassment. One day, I stopped going to the gym. The gym trainer messaged me saying that he loved me. When I rejected his proposal he spread a rumor that I loved him. This time I had protected myself and didn’t allow him to do anything to me.

I never got the time to heal from one incident. Whenever I tried to recover from one, I become the victim of other. But the only good thing is that these incidents taught me how to identify the evil lying beneath the gentleman’s face. I have definitely moved on in my life. Now, it’s not possible for people to fool me anymore.